An amazingly detailed tribute, you'd have to think this was taken from a journal, in which case it's impressive to keep such a record of their life, or maybe Stephen just has a fantastic memory.
Even through that detail you can really feel how much he loved and admired her.
> Somehow in the shock of what has happened it feels as if I just met Elise, and now she is gone.
A reminder that time's cruelty is making the wonderful feel shorter than the painful.
> My only solace in this tragedy is that the end came instantly, after a day filled with nothing but joy.
Hopefully we're all lucky enough to be allowed to rest without suffering while surrounded by loved ones.
cube00
I met Stephen in 2023 at some MIT AI conference. He was the kindest, most grandfatherly person. I was expecting to meet a relatively pontifical person given some of his work, but he was such the opposite that I was completely taken aback. I spent two hours that evening with him and a small group of people talking about language and maths and so on. (He was very kind to let me take a photo: https://postimg.cc/LYmVCs0G)
That conversation had a tremendous impact on me and completely changed my attitude towards meeting new people.
I am heartbroken for him and his family. And I can see that kind / heartfelt / grandfatherly nature throughout this memoriam.
And please, God, let me die with my wife like John Nash did in that NJ Turnpike taxi crash.
sebmellen
This is a moving tribute. Stephen Wolfram's writing often has certain faults, which I mention only to be able to say that he has here transcended them; this is a genuine and heartfelt piece of writing which makes me feel sad for his loss.
ajb
This was really moving and sincere. It made me think of my dad's catastrophic stroke while recovering from brain surgery. I wish that, like Wolfram's wife, he had died instantly on the operating table instead of enduring six years of agony for himself and everyone else.
senderista
I’ve been a light reader of Stephen Wolfram’s work over the years. I am grateful he’s taken the time to write this tribute. May she rest in peace and condolences to Stephen.
How I considered Stephen coming in to this:
1) he is wonderfully generous with his ideas and knowledge, especially towards the young. I think this is an extremely good quality.
2) he attracts envy from many people, partly because of his successes, but also because of his manner. I feel his manner is often totally unintentional to cause upset, but also I think he’s so unashamedly himself and how he wants to be that it is sometimes verging on rude, which people hold against him (mostly unfairly, sometimes fairly)
3) given his commitment to work I always wondered about how he balanced his personal life amongst all that
What I found very interesting about this letter was how his personal relationship seems to have been in keeping with the man we see on the outside:
1) the first thing in the lists on his wife, as well as what he spends significant time on in the letter, are her intellectual capabilities. He is a man of intellect through and through, and it shows in how he writes of his wife.
2) he mentions how he has failed to collaborate with her for their entire marriage because of their strong wills. It strikes me as somewhat sad that there’s this failure to connect somehow. It might be that a prioritisation of the intellect in life holds us back from virtues.
3) there were moments where he talks about how she was intuitively right and how he had to work things out by taking “the long way”. I just get the feeling that a lot of their relationship was somehow like this - where something obvious to the normal intuition is something to be worked out by the intellect.
4) I think there might be an element of regret in this letter. A regret that perhaps a connection could have been different had one chosen to indulge one’s intellect less. I feel like this moment perhaps made Stephen’s mind pause for a moment on that - an all too human pause.
m101
It's a profound thing to lose someone that intertwined in your life. I should know.
adamredwoods
> But from that moment on we talked essentially every day for 36 years
Man. Our culture is speed running away from one of the greatest joys you can have in your life (a healthy relationship). Stephen, if you can see this, thank you for opening up. Wishing you comfort and peace.
kylehotchkiss
A very beautiful tribute to her life and memory.
My condolences go out to her family.
klustregrif
It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, but, god damn does it still hurt to move through that loss. I'm glad it was fast and painless for her and her family.
comments (10)
Even through that detail you can really feel how much he loved and admired her.
> Somehow in the shock of what has happened it feels as if I just met Elise, and now she is gone.
A reminder that time's cruelty is making the wonderful feel shorter than the painful.
> My only solace in this tragedy is that the end came instantly, after a day filled with nothing but joy.
Hopefully we're all lucky enough to be allowed to rest without suffering while surrounded by loved ones.
cube00
That conversation had a tremendous impact on me and completely changed my attitude towards meeting new people.
I am heartbroken for him and his family. And I can see that kind / heartfelt / grandfatherly nature throughout this memoriam.
And please, God, let me die with my wife like John Nash did in that NJ Turnpike taxi crash.
sebmellen
ajb
senderista
How I considered Stephen coming in to this:
1) he is wonderfully generous with his ideas and knowledge, especially towards the young. I think this is an extremely good quality.
2) he attracts envy from many people, partly because of his successes, but also because of his manner. I feel his manner is often totally unintentional to cause upset, but also I think he’s so unashamedly himself and how he wants to be that it is sometimes verging on rude, which people hold against him (mostly unfairly, sometimes fairly)
3) given his commitment to work I always wondered about how he balanced his personal life amongst all that
What I found very interesting about this letter was how his personal relationship seems to have been in keeping with the man we see on the outside:
1) the first thing in the lists on his wife, as well as what he spends significant time on in the letter, are her intellectual capabilities. He is a man of intellect through and through, and it shows in how he writes of his wife.
2) he mentions how he has failed to collaborate with her for their entire marriage because of their strong wills. It strikes me as somewhat sad that there’s this failure to connect somehow. It might be that a prioritisation of the intellect in life holds us back from virtues.
3) there were moments where he talks about how she was intuitively right and how he had to work things out by taking “the long way”. I just get the feeling that a lot of their relationship was somehow like this - where something obvious to the normal intuition is something to be worked out by the intellect.
4) I think there might be an element of regret in this letter. A regret that perhaps a connection could have been different had one chosen to indulge one’s intellect less. I feel like this moment perhaps made Stephen’s mind pause for a moment on that - an all too human pause.
m101
adamredwoods
Man. Our culture is speed running away from one of the greatest joys you can have in your life (a healthy relationship). Stephen, if you can see this, thank you for opening up. Wishing you comfort and peace.
kylehotchkiss
klustregrif
steve_adams_86
BewareTheYiga